I'm Creatively Disturbed.
whee.

I AM COLLEEN.

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I'm Colleen.

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Thursday, September 02, 2004
a little piece of me

mood: peachy

music: {ghost of the robot - "vehicles shock me"} <~actually quite a good song...

yea, here's a piece. enjoy.

this is actually a full scene, so whee. READ THIS PLEASE. thank you ;)



INT. – HOTEL BEDROOM – DAY (Before the incident)

 

Light breaks into the room from behind closed curtains, and Drew stirs in bed. Someone is seated next to her, awaiting her arousal. (Not that kind of arousal, you dirty, dirty, child.)

Her eyes open slowly, take in the view of the person next to her, and then shut. Without reopening them, she speaks.

 

      DREW

      (Groggily)

      Danielle, what the hell are you doing in my hotel room?

 

DANIELLE holds up a cupcake with a single lit candle stabbed into the center, and begins to sing the Birthday Song. After she is finished, she returns to her normal voice.

 

      DANIELLE

      Happy sixteenth, Drew-ness. Come on, sit up and blow the candle out.

     

      DREW

      (Eyes still fastened)

      How did you get in here without a key?

 

      DANIELLE

      (Anxious)

      I flirted with a bell-boy and got him to let me in.

      (Bouncing in her seat)

      Come on, come on, now make a wish and blow the candle out before the whole thing catches fire.

 

Drew unwillingly rises from her sheets, hair going out in all directions, and takes a look at the cupcake, questioning its origin.

 

      DREW

      Dani, that’s a cupcake from the batch they were giving out free in the entrance       hall yesterday.

 

      DANIELLE

      (Still enthusiastic)

      So? It’s still a cupcake, it’s still your birthday, and you’ve still got to blow    the candle out. Come-fûcking-on, you pain in the ass, make a wish.

 

DREW

(Sardonically)

Well, when you put it like that, who am I to oppose?

 

She hunkers down, closes her eyes for a brief moment in deep thought, opens them, and blows out the flame that was atop the half-melted candle.

 

DANIELLE

What did you wish for?

 

DREW

Now, Danielle Melissa Harrison, if I told you what I wished for it wouldn’t   come true, would it?

 

DANIELLE

(Rolls eyes)

Don’t give me that, you of all people shouldn’t believe that shiit-drenched myth       that society feeds us.

(Sneaks a few finger dips of icing)

They make it sound as if the wish would come true in the first place. And you       and I both know better than to be so naïve.

 

DREW

(Shows discomfort; rubs eyes in fatigue)

God, woman, quit running your mouth, it’s too fûcking early for me to be       listening.

 

Drew pulls the sheets off of herself and gets out of bed, revealing her sleep-attire; a white spaghetti strap and a pair of simple white underwear.

 

      DANIELLE

      Then tell me what you wished for, you big pansy-ass wench.

 

Drew shrugs her shoulders and holds them in suspension.

 

      DREW

      Stop your probing. And name-calling wont get you jack shiit. Why do you want to know, anyway?

      (Pause; no answer from Danielle, just a blank gaze)

      Fine, if you’re so damned curious-

      (Beat; drops her shoulders)

      I wished for a happy ending.

 

Danielle’s gaze drops to a frown, and she gets up from her place on the bed, wanders over to her life-long friend and takes her in a cordial embrace.

 

      DANIELLE

      (Into her ear)

      You’ll have it. Eventually.

      (Beat)

      Now stop being a depressed little blob, it’s your fûcking birthday. Get wacky,      get wild. Get wasted.

      (Lets her go)

      Don’t forget we’re meeting the crew for bagels and cappuccinos. They’ve all got     you a gift. Plus, Curtis says he wrote you a song on his new acoustic.

 

      DREW

      (Throws her head back)

      God, Curtis has to stop trying.

 

      DANIELLE

      Yea, . He doesn’t have to stop trying; you have to stop rejecting him.

 

Drew saunters over to the window and pushes the curtains to the side and looks out at the fading light.

 

      DREW

      (Sighs)

      No, I’m just not interested.

 

DANIELLE

The fûck you aren’t. You’ve been interested since the third grade. And he’s a       good guy, unlike every other walking pênis you’ll find in our school.

 

DREW

(After a brief giggle)

Well, I just don’t like him anymore.

 

DANIELLE

Yea, as if I’d believe that.

(Beat)

It’s not that you’ve lost interest in him. You’re just discouraged and upset with your parents’ split-up. You’ve been like this for two God damn weeks.

(Takes hold of her shoulders)

It’s your birthday. Act like it. And act like the Drew that I knew before all       this drama happened. I’m starting to miss her; we’re all starting to miss her.

 

Drew turns around and smiles at Danielle. Danielle takes hold of her cheek and gives her a gentle and encouraging smack.

 

      DANIELLE

      (Off pajamas)

      Now go put some real clothes on.

      (Beat)

      You’re driving the lêsbian inside me crazy with that outfit.

      (Winks)

 

Drew laughs, grabs some clothes from off the chair, and runs into the bathroom. While she is dressing, Danielle snacks on the cupcake’s icing.

 

Drew exits the bathroom fully clothed, es her side-bag, and absconds the bedroom with her friend at her side, leaving the cupcake behind.

 

They go into the living room of the hotel suite, and Drew walks off toward another room in front of her.

 

      DANIELLE

      What are you doing?

 

      DREW

      (Looking O.S.)

      I’ve got to check on my mom.

 

      DANIELLE

      Is she still catatonic?

 

      DREW

      (Turns the door knob)

      We’ll see.

 

They enter into the room to see Drew’s mother, MRS. DUNVILLE, seated at the foot of her already-made bed. It looks untouched, almost as if she hadn’t gone to sleep at all. She was staring into a void, hands entwined and resting on her lap.

 

      DREW

      Mom?

      (Caringly)

      I’m going out for some breakfast with Danielle and the rest; do you want me to       bring you back a bagel or some coffee?

 

No sound from her mother.

 

      DANIELLE

      (Jokingly)

      Can I pick you up some Pall Malls and côndoms, Mrs. D? Textured or flavored?

 

As she says this, Drew throws a playful smack her way onto her abdomen, Danielle is laughing while she crouches over in hilarity. There is still no answer from Mrs. Dunville, just silence.

 

Danielle looks at Drew, perplexed, and hops in front of her doing a “Happy Dance.”

 

      DANIELLE

      Hey come on, Mrs. D.

      (Beat)

      It’s Drew’s birthday. Let’s boogie!

      (Does the twist; turns back to her; stops)

      Alright, fine. Be a stiff.

 

Drew looks at Danielle disapprovingly and shakes her head in disappointment. Danielle shrugs and leaves the room. As she exits, she speaks.

 

      DANIELLE

      (To Drew)

      I’m gonna go have a cigarette; I’ll meet you outside in front of the building.

 

Drew walks over to her mother and notices that she is dressed in the same clothes she wore yesterday. She pushes a clump of hair out of her still face and places it behind her cold ear. She pulls a brush from the cosmetics bag on the side and starts to comb her hair gently. 

 

      DREW

      (While brushing)

      We’re going to end up fine, ma.

 

When she is finished she puts down the brush and ambles on over to the window to open up the curtains, and continues to speak.

 

      DREW

      It’s all going to be okay. We’ll get through this.

      (Pause)

      I’m going out; I’ll probably be back in an hour with some breakfast for you.

      (Beat)

      Until then, we’re on the top floor, look at that view. It’s beautiful isn’t it?

 

She returns to her mother and gives her a tender kiss on the cheek.

 

      DREW

      I love you, ma.

 

She leaves her mother and walks out of the room, shutting the door.

 

A tear falls from Mrs. Dunville’s eye, and pursues down her cheek.

 

      MRS. DUNVILLE

      (In a whisper)

      I love you too.



Please tell me what you think, I would love some feedback. Thank you.

Posted at 12:18 pm by crows_vein
Only (3) found me charming.  

Wednesday, September 01, 2004
wowness

music: {boy sets fire - "rookie"}



i got my school information today in the mail. locker number and combo, and my advisory class. it's the same stuff as last year. same locker, same combination, and same advisory. great, not much of a change, no problems. woohoo!
and i'm absolutely extatic. do you know why? because i'm on a roll with my script. i'm loving it, i'm reading it over and over, and i think it's great. at least for my first try, you know? i can't wait to finish it. and have all my friends read it. whee!
i'm going to post a piece of it in here later.
anywho, i'm going to go work on it. ta ta.

Colleen

Posted at 02:38 pm by crows_vein
Charmed or frightened?  

Tuesday, August 31, 2004
nothing new this year

well. this year is going to be interesting. my mother had just informed me that she's not going to buy me any new clothes for the new school year. personally, i don't care. it's the reason she gave me that bothers me. "you have a bunch of clothes in the closet that you never wear." yes. okay. true. but that never bothered her before. evidently, my parents are in a financial slump. in need of saving money for my mother's emergency trip to mexico. (to nurse my cancerous grandmother to health) today i caught my mother on the phone asking our landlord for a stretch on this month's rent. i'm not yet sure whether the permission was granted.
well. fine. i'm glad she's putting the money to use, rather than buying cowboy boots and gucci bags from catalogues every damned day. (she's awaiting the boots in the mail)
i don't mind sticking with the same clothes. i don't care. i can improvise. i can make it work. i've made it work before. i have to admit though, that i tend to wear the same thing everyday. teehee.
anywho, i can't wait for the school year to start. i'm not anticipating the problem with tom, or the summer reading assignments due the first day. i just need to see my friends, see my new teachers. basically i just want to get the fûck away from my family.

Colleen

Posted at 09:52 pm by crows_vein
Charmed or frightened?  

touch me with cold hands

No mood right now

Music: {Dimmu Borgir - "Puritania"}

what to do. what to do. well. i'm just going to have to see what happens when school starts. i loath making big deals of things when they haven't even happened yet. i haven't seen tom in months, and i'm already placing him under the Walking Dick catagory. maybe he is one. actually, i'm pretty sure he is.
am i really afraid? should i really give tom a chance?

yes, i'm afraid. and no, i should not.

i need my brittany. she hasn't been around lately on the computer, and i'm suffering from withdrawal. she usually helps me out with things, and i need her more than ever.

maybe i'll just give him a chance. learn from my own fûck ups. sure, he might try to get me in bed. but it's not like he's going to succeed. sure he might cheat on me, but it's not like it'd be a surprise. and most definitely, he'd dump me. but hell, rejection isn't new to me.

...and just for the record, i'm content with being a child in the forest.


Colleen


Posted at 01:19 pm by crows_vein
Charmed or frightened?  

Monday, August 30, 2004
interference on a light note

why. why are teenagers plagued with such a need for drama?

why am i plagued with a conscience?

i made a choice before. and now i'm rethinking it over. well mother fruiting son of a peach, wtf am i supposed to do? take a chance with happiness? or let the possible joy pass me by? i hope all of you know that eternal misery is a potential result of this short-term happiness. should that affect my decision?

god. i don't trust my own mind. and when i'm actually willing to, it's being indecisive. should i end this thing before it starts with tom? or see how it plays out?

hmm.. you tell me.

Colleen


Posted at 10:53 pm by crows_vein
Only (2) found me charming.  

Sunday, August 29, 2004
that sounds dirty doesn't it?


pretty crappy (red dot week, going to be pretty crappy for the next 7 days)

music: {incubus - "nice to know you"}






i changed the title of my blog from "The Crow's Vein" to "Tickle My Fancy" and now that i think about it, it sounds a little dirty doesn't it? oh well, it wasn't an intentional obscênity.
anywho, yesterday was nav's party thing. t'was very cool. we ate pizza and some fries, then we went to walk along the beach. it was a long walk to the shore, let me tell you. then kayla, nav, and carolyn put their feet in the water. amber, jess, amanda and i decided to stay dry. then we decided to take some pictures of old hairy men, and some group pictures of ourselves. (not with the hairy men, mind you) then we walked back. kayla ran all the way ahead, all lonesome, i tried to run to catch up with her but when i was half way there i tripped and fell. i sat in the sand for a while, and the only person that showed some concern was carolyn. i heart her, she's so very unique. one of the greatest people to be around.
so when we reached the boardwalk, we put our shoes back on and lost kayla. we found her and wandered around. went to the restroom, i had a strong urge to e but the stalls were filthy. i have a thing about public bathrooms. ick, especially ones as disgusting and crowded as that one. we went out to search for kayla again and nav's mom. we found them, and just wandered around some more. nav opened her presents, she liked my gift. (but today online i found out that it doesn't fit her. it turns out that she's a small, not an extra-small. oops for me.) then after several hours of loitering, we played miniature . and then had some ice cream. yum. then my dad picked me up on the motorcycle. i was a little scared because it was dark, and i detest riding on it in the dark. just a trifle freaky.

yea so yesterday was pretty awesome. nav's mom is super.

today the parentals went to some motorcycle ride out in lindenhurst. i stayed home with moira. we watched jurassic park 3, jumanji, and johnny english. (today was J, and tomorrow we'll watch movies that start with the letter K, lol)
parents came home from the ride. we finished watching johnny english with dad, and i went to go read my book outside. moira wouldn't leave me alone. i was with her all day, and i'm surprised she isn't sick of me. she's one of the only people that can tolerate my presence for more than 8 hours (and she's 5). kudos to her.

bored and tired. off to go watch some tv. maybe something interesting is on. i'd be shocked.

Colleen

Visit icons_4ever's Xanga Site!

Posted at 08:55 pm by crows_vein
Charmed or frightened?  

Saturday, August 28, 2004
i've got it!



i have got it. how good am i...muahaha... anywho. i've decided on how to make rhamsy die (if you have no idea what i'm talking about, scroll down and read my past entry, i don't want you to think of me as a homicidal lunatic. even though that is what i am underneath this timid shell of mine...)

drew's father won't be killed in a car crash. he'll cheat on his wife and abandon his family and then her mom will jump off the building. muahaha. so that makes room for one traffic incident. rhamsy's. he'll be the one that takes a fall off the side of a cliff in his car. this is fabulous. i've never been so happy over pre-organized dêath. i feel evil ;x

so anyways, today is nav's party. and it just so happens that my father has decided that he'll take me there on his motorcycle. pretty excited about it. i havent been on his bike in a long time. i'm just afraid that my ass'll hurt when i get there. it's at jones beach and that's pretty far away. maybe i'll tie a pillow to my ass...hmm...

oh well, going to go get ready. later, youngsters.

Colleen
 
note to internetcombers: don't snag this icon. thank you.

Posted at 04:03 pm by crows_vein
Only (1) found me charming.  

Friday, August 27, 2004
"but i'm not a warrior... i'm a duck."


indecisive

if you're just a passer by, i would never ask this of you, but please read the whole entry. thank you.

current::

tunes: {rx bandits - "sell you beautiful"}
munchies: nothing at the moment, not hungry.
poison: chocolate milk. yum.
attire: yellow plaid jammie pants and my blue "my daddy likes donuts" shirt.
worry: what to do about ze script.







i used to get all my icons from greatestjournal. but now i've turned to xanga. whoo, go xanga.
since my computer is being a butt, i used moira's computer and got to swap IMs with my Iesbian lover last night over. i heart meh brittykins ;D (incase any of you are wondering, she's not really my lover, it's just an inside joke, and we have many more.) we discussed random things. nothing specific. just our anticipation towards the new school year, and our worries about how things'll turn out. blah.

i am...tired and bored. tonight we're going to town hall to watch jurassic park. i don't want to. i want to stay home. and after my mom does her "aerobics" i have to do my yoga. surprisingly enough, i don't want to do that either. i just feel like lying down, looking up at my dust- and bug carcass-infested ceiling and figuring out what i'm going to do about the movie script. i downloaded the first draft of dogma's script for an example, something to read and learn from. it isn't much help. it did however make me realize that i don't need to include the camera movements or directions. thank the lord. that would have been a pain. i took some notes yesterday and taught myself some things necessary for a script. abreviations for director lingo. wanna see? you can read what i write, or just click this link for more vivid information.

1
INT. - interior, meaning in a room or building
EXT. - evidently exterior, in the yard or in a street
INT/EXT. - character is inside looking out
EXT/INT. - character is outside looking in

2
Crab - camera moves completely left to right
Pan - camera pivots left to right
Tilt - pivots up or down
Boom - moves completely up or down
Dolly - moves in and our of subject
Zoom - camera merely zooms in and out

3
C/U - close up
MS - medium shot
LS - long shot
2 Shot - shot of 2 characters in same picture
V.O. - voice over
O.S. - off screen
P.O.V. - point of view
M.O.S. - without sound

the only things i'm going to include are sections 1 and 3. section 2 can be either added in or i can wing it if i decide to actually film it. which i highly doubt i'll get to do so. this script will be much too complex to film with my limitation of casting. who am i going to get to play the mom, the teacher, natalia, or zach? they're all older than the people i have access to. but hey...i'll figure it out.

i'm going to go work on it now. or maybe just ponder about the plot. i cant seem to decide how drew's english teacher dies in the end. i would love it to be % A, but her mother already took up that position. you cant have two self inflicted deâths in one movie, well maybe you can, but i won't have it.
i don't want rhamsy (drew's english teacher) to die of anything health related. no diseases. i want to be an . car crash is too cliche. plus her father is set for a tumble off the side of cliff a in his buick anyhow. so two vehicle incidents intailing ities, i won't have that either. anyone have a suggestion? i was thinking about him being mugged. but its in a small town outside of boston, a mugging would be too much of a coincidence. so if any of you readers have an idea as to how i can cut rhamsy out of the picture, leave a comment in this entry. please. i need an idea. thank you.

so until i figure out how he dies, i'll just continue writing it. bye bye.




these two icons here symbolize a lot. the first one resembles my attitude towards tom. i plan to just erase him from my memory. pretend that i still haven't had my first kiss. pretend that i was never flirted with, and pretend that no guy has ever confessed his interest in me before. and the second icon...well it symbolizes how i never felt true love. and how i constantly wonder what it feels like. i think i'm leading to a comment question of the day.

so included with your suggestion towards the dêath of rhamsy must be the answer to this question.

have you ever experienced love, and if so would you please elaborately describe what it's like?

Colleen



Posted at 02:31 pm by crows_vein
Only (3) found me charming.  

Thursday, August 26, 2004
a young spielberg?

inspired by a television show that i have adopted as a new favorite during the summer, i've decided to drop the story-writing for a while. i think i'd like to try something a little new. i would like to reattempt a movie script. now that i looked up the correct way how, i think i'll do better this time.

dawson's creek has shown me the light. shut up, it's a great show. i've watched it all this summer. now that i'm home in the mornings, i get to watch it. from 10 am to 12. two episodes in a row whee. i remember back in the day when it started out, my older sister loved it. she used to stay up late at night watching it, swooning over dawson and blowing melodramatic happenings out of proportion. everyone used to say how much she looked like joey. i don't see the physical resemblance, but the speech patterns and voice tones are similar. just watching the show reminds me of her. i guess that's why i watch it. also because i love jack. ;)

in the episode that aired today he confessed his hômosêxuality. i've seen that episode about 3 times in the past, but it still made me scream with joy. go jack and his fruitness.

but anywho, back to the movie script. at this moment i am starting one called "what the world cannot see" it is about a young grl who's father was killed in a traffic , and who's mother committed % A because of it. the lass is sent to live with her siblings who share a house outside of boston. starts a new school and develops a fervent friendship with her english teacher. (it's always the english teacher.) later on she discovers that her parents that have died were never her real parents. and yada yada yada...something blurs and that's all i've got.

i havent established the actual plot just yet. i was thinking there would be some sort of vampiric conflict, but no. i think its time for something contemporary and real. i'll wing it.

Colleen
Visit BLACK_isBEAUTIFUL's Xanga Site!

Posted at 05:08 pm by crows_vein
Only (2) found me charming.  

Wednesday, August 25, 2004
the dance ;)


dumbfounded

music: {bon jovi - "bad medicine"}

there ain't no doctor that can kill my disease...

credit to my lover ;)



credit to "megz"




eh so not much has happened lately. the other day we went shopping for moira. we bought her a bunch of school clothes. she's going to start kindergarten soon. *tear* she's growing up so fast, and i feel that even if i turn away for a second, i'll miss a lifetime.
yesterday we went out looking for stuff. things to enhance her bedroom. we bought her a brand new computer desk, a bunch of hangers and closet shelves. a shoe wrack.
i called nav yesterday to RSVP to her beach birthday bash this saturday. it turns out that her birthday was yesterday so i wished her a happy one. like 4 times. oh well, you can't be too sure.
i'm tired, bored, and i've got nothing to do. i'm going to go burn something with my dad's new lighter. x_x

Colleen


Posted at 01:50 pm by crows_vein
Charmed or frightened?  

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